Veteranism at weddings by a perfect gentleman

I had an interesting meeting last evening at a friend's daughters wedding reception at a five star hotel in town. I took my place in the long queue behind an elegantly dressed lady, waiting for my turn to wish the bride and groom on achieving their big milestone.

And along came a fine looking gentleman chewing something. He immediately stretched out his right hand to greet me while he covered his mouth with his left "Sorry ... (while chewing) Good evening," he said after he finished chewing, "You know it is good to chew on something while we wait because you never know how long this could take. You see I'm a veteran at attending weddings in this city." 

He took his place behind me and so I turned to smile at him, "Good evening and what makes you a veteran?"

"Well I have attended an umpteen number of weddings in this city and so I have now figured out the art of making it as pleasant an experience despite the frustrations that one is forced to deal with. In the first place getting to a venue is the most infuriating as most wedding receptions start at 7.00 pm and that is the peak hour for traffic. So, although my home on a traffic free day is 10 mins away, this evening it has taken me 45 mins to get here. This could have been 2 hours at the minimum had the venue been in the suburbs."

"I can't agree more - traffic in the city is a nightmare!"

"So, when you finally reach the venue, much flustered most of the time depending on the mode of transport you have used, you first need to go to the wash room to freshen up and touch up as it has been a while since you have been on the road. Then you find out directions and get to the designated banquet hall, where as you enter you first need to figure out the layout of the hall and what the rest of the guests are doing. Is the couple ready to meet guests on stage or they yet to arrive? If they have arrived on stage before you arrived it is more than certain that there is a line to meet them on the right of the stage. So instead of approaching the stage to wish the couple, you have to master the art of containing your enthusiasm and like a civil guest find the end of the line, take your place in it and then patiently wait for your TURN. And of course depending on the number of guests invited and your luck it could take anything between 45 mins to an hour before you actually get to meet the couple by which time you are sweaty again (if it is an open air venue) and your stomach is growling with hunger."

"That is so true," I said "In fact I often duck the line when it is really long and go straight for the food counters ... specially if I don't know too many other people at the wedding, and go about the greeting later."

It was about 8.30 pm by then and my stomach was making demands of "FEED ME" to my brain with repeated ferocity. Finger foods were doing the rounds at a slight distance from us and so I signaled to one of the waiters. Thankfully he caught my eye and moved in our direction with a tray of Chicken Tikka and a practiced smile.

My newly acquired queue friend (I'm going to call him QF) looked on animatedly as I poked at a piece of chicken with a toothpick, dipped in the green chutney bowl and popped it in my mouth. It was delicious so I quickly grabbed another piece from the tray and looked at QF suggesting that he should try some too, "No thanks, I will go with vegetarian."

"Oh okay... can you send some vegetarian snacks please?" I said to the waiter. He nodded and moved on. I too am a preferred vegetarian, I said in my mind. I couldn't get myself to say it aloud though, since I had just merrily stuffed my face with chicken tikka pieces!

Another gentleman who seemed to know QF well walked up and greeted him and they began to exchange pleasantries so I looked ahead and beyond the many heads in front of me to guesstimate how long it would be before it was my turn. There were at least 20 people ahead of me and that meant anything between 25 to 30 mins more!

QF cleared his throat behind me, as if to indicate that he was ready to continue his piece on being a veteran and so I turned and smiled at him again, "The waiting is made easier by engaging in a conversation with someone enchanting like yourself. Actually it is best to take weddings away from the city. My wife and I did so for our daughters wedding. We had it at an offsite location for which we called a select group of people who were there with us for all the ceremonies ... there was no traffic or waiting. On stage we had a band playing and the newly weds were walking around meeting the guests."

"Oh that sounds beautiful"

"Indeed it was. Another important thing about the waiting is that when my turn finally arrives I meet the couple, who invariable doesn't know me from Adam ... clearly it wouldn't make a difference to them whether I am here or not. I am here of course because I know one of the parents. Are you known to the girls or the boys family?"

"The girl's mother is an ex-colleague," I said

"Okay ... and once this is done there is a bigger line at the food counter, which takes yet another 30 to 45 mins at the minimum depending on the variety on offer.

At this point along came a waiter with some Mutton Sheekh Kebabs and QF quickly took a piece using a toothpick. I immediately stopped him mid-stuffing his face saying "Hey that is non-vegetarian" to which he said, "I prefer vegetarian, but that doesn't mean I don't eat non-vegetarian" :) 

I was really amused by now and enjoying this conversation and almost wanting my TURN to take longer. "Ah one thing that is key to being at a wedding - to remember to give the envelope. I often forget and am embarrassed ... so I will have it sent later with a note done by my wife," he chuckled and at this point he called out to the lady ahead of me and introduced her to me as his wife. She turned and smiled at me and I was like ... "Oh hello ... it is good to make your acquaintance."

I smiled to myself trying to make out "What just happened?" and then I realised ... QF my dear new found friend, had been chatting with me for the past 45 mins about his veteran-ism on weddings without me having a clue that he was at the wedding with his wife. He had basically arrived at the line after me and instead of joining his wife ahead of me he respectfully stood behind me, and engage in a conversation with me that actually turned out to be delightful. So very uncharacteristic of the usual person that would have just walked past me and joined his wife ignoring me completely.

"What is your name?" he asked.
"Priya Sharma Shaikh."
"There's a story there I'm sure ... what do you do?"
I nodded and smiled, "I am an event management professional."
"Well, then you must be very used to all this."
"Yes I am," I said, "but it is always good to hear a guests perspective."

He nodded and joined his wife to go on to the stage to meet the couple.

It had taken me precisely 45 mins to get to meet the couple and the girl's parents. The mother, friend from some years ago was thrilled to see me and looked proud of her new status as Mother-in-law. I felt happy to see her happiness and I hugged her warmly. The bride looked beautiful and nothing like the gawky teenager I had met over a decade ago. She was quickly given reference of me and she smiled warmly as I hugged and wished her and her handsome groom and his parents ... and I was almost done and then I remembered to handover the envelope.

"Please do eat dinner Priya," my friend called after me. I looked over my shoulder and bid them goodbye and headed to the left of the stage for the stairs to get off. It had all lasted less than five minutes in all.

When I finished my turn QF and his wife were still at the left of the stage (they were ahead of me right!) waiting to say goodbye to me. I was humbled. I thanked him for making the waiting so very special.

And before I knew it he was gone leaving me smiling ... and that was that!